What did I just write

It's funny how over the past few days my emotional state has been spiraling down. 


It simply just happens. I take my mind off a couple of things through means of leisure like watching Dog Whisperer or The Walking Dead or by talking to other friends to keep the loneliness at bay. But for some reason, the abyssal gap left inside me can never be satiated fully; the hunger never stops, it can only be satisfied for such a short while. 


Then I begin to cry. The tears keep coming like grief and anger on a conveyor belt that stretches on and on. Memories come next. A plethora of guilt-inducing moments that make me sick with unhappiness. I try to comfort myself with the nicer memories, but most of the time, the bad memories trump all the good ones. It's a futile internal struggle. Sometimes, I cry so much I eventually become tired of being sad. Instead, I become indifferent and angry. 


Last night, I cried for a good one hour. And I'm not exaggerating. 


Ugh. I'm so emotionally unstable. 


And I feel so alone.