The past few days have been a bit stressful and lonely. I've been trying to shut out the bigger issues at stake with escapades of scenic views, cool, crisp weather, and alone time. Though reminiscing isn't too far off from my methods of escape. It's always nice to remember the good memories in life, but unfortunately you'll receive nothing but a splash of cold water on your face when you try to re-live them once more.
The memories are painfully bittersweet, and I cannot help but compare the past to the present, even if my attempts are nothing but futile and underestimated. While I have been reflecting on our previous moments, I realized that it was probably me who was at fault. I've taken you for granted and branded you as the guilty and selfish one. Maybe it's really me who has done wrong, maybe it was you, or maybe it could have been the both of us. There are so many different possibilities and perspectives that are beyond my comprehension. But in my search I found solace.
I feel enlightened, actually. Like I'm ready to confront and talk to you. Negativity, pain, and anger seemed to disappear from my heart and my mind. I think that our previous attempts at resolution were a failure since we failed to speak and think without malice. Strong emotions like anger and grief can twist our perception of things. I was always told that space needs to play a crucial role in our issue, though I was stubborn and refused space in the hopes of closure instead. But now, space from you and others helped me find myself and renew me. I feel much better now, and I'm ready to face you.
I just hope you've done and experienced the same.
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